My Heart and Other Black Holes

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Sixteen-year-old physics nerd Aysel is obsessed with plotting her own death. With a mother who can barely look at her without wincing, classmates who whisper behind her back, and a father whose violent crime rocked her small town, Aysel is ready to turn her potential energy into nothingness.

There’s only one problem: she’s not sure she has the courage to do it alone. But once she discovers a website with a section called Suicide Partners, Aysel’s convinced she’s found her solution: a teen boy with the username FrozenRobot (aka Roman) who’s haunted by a family tragedy is looking for a partner.

Even though Aysel and Roman have nothing in common, they slowly start to fill in each other’s broken lives. But as their suicide pact becomes more concrete, Aysel begins to question whether she really wants to go through with it. Ultimately, she must choose between wanting to die or trying to convince Roman to live so they can discover the potential of their energy together. Except that Roman may not be so easy to convince.


I just finished reading my heart and other black holes — and it’s beautiful. It’s raw and insightful from the very beginning to crafting hope and the power of human connection to the very end. It touched the deepest parts of my heart.

It brings to light how our thoughts and opinions are subjective to our mind — depending on our perspective.

How depression isn’t about the outside but more so about the inside — our view of the world, interpretation, inner voice.

How love and understanding [in specific understanding – greatly] can reform-reshape our perspective. How someone understanding the weirdest-scariest-darkest parts of you can bring comfort and happiness.

How the friendships we least expect to deepen and bloom can paint our world — changing our view of ourselves and the world, if we give them a chance and let them in.

How finding refuge in their understanding and care can lighten our insides — and this just made me ever so grateful for the ones who I am able to empty the insides of my mind and heart to. I am grateful for you.

But coming back the author so gracefully carries grief-sadness and crafts hope. My heart and other black holes is insightful and comfort all together. It’s beautiful.

Rating: 4.5/5


Sabila Siddiqui

A medical student who is passionate about content creation; taking the form of writing, graphic art, videography, and photography.